Treatment for Imposter Syndrome in Cheshire, CT
Impostor Syndrome: What Is It?
What if everyone finds out I don’t know what I’m doing?
How does she have it all together?
I’m such a failure as a parent.
I’m a total mess!
Impostor syndrome is when you doubt your skills or accomplishments and feel your achievements are undeserved. You may feel inferior to others or worry about being exposed as a fraud, which can lead to a fear of being judged or rejected.
Impostor syndrome can cause anxiety, panic attacks, poor sleep, and nightmares. You might “overthink” or find it hard to relax. Left untreated, it can lead to avoidance, errors, feeling paralyzed, isolation, and increased depression or anxiety.
Here’s the thing about impostor syndrome: it usually involves feeling inadequate or fraudulent despite real achievements. It only happens to you if you’ve attained a certain level of achievement or recognition based on things you’ve done. We get afraid that someone will “find out” that we are not as great as they think we are, but usually the accomplishment is earned in some way.
Impostor Syndrome and Perfectionism
Impostor syndrome can relate to perfectionism. Having high expectations of yourself, or growing up with others who do, can lead you to think you need to be perfect all the time, and anything less is unacceptable. This is known as all-or-nothing thinking, or black-and-white thinking. If I think I need to be perfect, then I can’t let anyone else know I’m not, or they will be disappointed in me. The mistake here is thinking that other people expect you to be perfect. Being recognized for doing a good job does not necessarily mean you did a perfect job, and it does not take away from your achievement.
Impostor Syndrome and Social Media
Images and stories on social media can often impact our self-esteem. It feels like EVERYONE is achieving more, and looking better while doing it. Most of us know rationally that we should stop “comparing our deleted scenes to other people's highlight reel”, but the images and stories still have an impact. It is impossible to compare yourself on social media without feeling like you are coming up short.
In individual therapy, we examine fact vs. fiction. Is everyone really achieving more? Or are they just making it look that way? Are other people really going on multiple vacations, or does it just seem that way because you are always looking at someone’s vacation pics? The adorable holiday picture doesn’t show the meltdowns before and after (and I’m not just talking about the kids!). In therapy, we’ll focus on what you want to achieve and how to get you there, rather than wasting time on how others want you to perceive their lives.
Overcoming Imposter Syndrome Through Therapy
Many clients come to me telling me how “lucky” they’ve been to get where they are; they are afraid their “luck” will run out, and they will be found out as an impostor. In therapy, we examine your role in the situation. In almost every instance, there are choices you made that have contributed to getting you to where you are. By recognizing that your intentional choices got you there (in addition to a little luck sometimes!), you can feel more comfortable focusing on how to do well in your situation and less on whether you deserve to be there.
Therapy can help you rewrite your mental scripts, focus less on others, and recognize your worth. These steps help you feel less overwhelmed, more in control, and better able to enjoy your success.
Get Started with Imposter Syndrome Treatment in Cheshire, CT
Schedule a consultation today to discuss how therapy can help you reduce impostor syndrome and recognize your achievements.
Treatment for imposter syndrome is also available via telehealth across Connecticut.